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Windows XP: Programs Stop Responding

I don't know if this belongs in Microsoft or in HP? So I'm putting it in both.

When ether I or my computer's security runs a disk defragment, and after its done all the programs on my computer randomly quits responding. like if i'm on the internet both Firefox or IE will stop responding. I then will have to open the task manager to close whatever program stopped responding. then reopen it. I even had the task manager stop responding a few times.
This not responding will get so bad I will have to run a destructive recovery, then everything will be fine The security I'm using is Windows Live One Care and it runs whats called a tune up every 2 weeks and it runs Disk defregment during this tuneup and it can't be stopped I can only change how often it runs it. but after a while If I don't run a disk defragment my computer gets really slow.

When i called HP Tech support they keep telling me to run a destructive recovery. that's the only thing can tell me to do, now since my extended warranty ran out they won't help me with out charging me $49.00 to my phone bill. I went ahead and did that one time and they told me to run a destructive recovery, wasted $49.00

There has to be a different way to handle this beside running a destructive recovery every other month.

I don't know what else to do I just about gave up and went out and bought a new computer. this computer is only a year and one and a half months old. then i was watching some tech show on Fox news when they mentioned this site as being as good place to get real help fast. so I'm here can anybody help me with this?
 
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